An Eastern European goes to get their eyes tested. The bottom line of the eye chart has the letters:
C Z Y N Q S T A S Z
The optometrist asks, "Can you read the bottom line?"
"Read it?" the person replies, "I know the guy!"
eye test
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- PlatinumLounger
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Re: eye test
Reminiscent of the historic article...
CLINTON DEPLOYS VOWELS TO BOSNIA
Cities of Sjlbvdnzv, Grzny to be First Recipients
Before an emergency joint session of Congress yesterday, President
Clinton announced US plans to deploy over 75,000 vowels to the war-torn
region of Bosnia. The deployment, the largest of its kind in American
history, will provide the region with the critically-needed letters
A, E, I, O and U, and it is hoped to render countless Bosnian names
more pronounceable.
"For six years, we have stood by while names like Ygrjvslhv and Tzlynhr
and Glrm have been horribly butchered by millions around the world,"
Clinton said. "Today, the United States must finally stand up and say
'Enough.' It is time the people of Bosnia finally had some vowels in
their incomprehensible words. The US is proud to lead the crusade in
this noble endeavour."
The deployment, dubbed Operation Vowel Storm by the State Department,
is set for early next week, with the Adriatic port cities of Sjlbvdnzv
and Grzny slated to be the first recipients. Two C-130 transport
planes, each carrying over 500 24-count boxes of "E's", will fly from
Andrews Air Force Base across the Atlantic and airdrop the letters
over the cities.
Citizens of Grzny and Sjlbvdnzv eagerly await the arrival of the vowels.
"My God, I do not think we can last another day," Trszg Grzdnjkln, 44,
said. "I have six children and none of them has a name which is
understandable to me or to anyone else. Mr Clinton, please send my
poor, wretched family just one 'E'. Please." Said Sjlbvdnzv resident
Grg Hmphrs, 67: "With just a few key letters, I could be George
Humphries. This is my dream."
The airdrop represents the largest deployment of any letter to a foreign
country since 1984. During the summer of that year, the US shipped
92,000 consonants to Ethiopia, providing cities like Ouaouoaua,
Eaoiiuae and Aao with vital, life-giving supplies of L's, S's and T's.
The consonant-relief effort failed, however, when vast quantities of the
letters were intercepted and hoarded by violent, gun-toting warlords.
CLINTON DEPLOYS VOWELS TO BOSNIA
Cities of Sjlbvdnzv, Grzny to be First Recipients
Before an emergency joint session of Congress yesterday, President
Clinton announced US plans to deploy over 75,000 vowels to the war-torn
region of Bosnia. The deployment, the largest of its kind in American
history, will provide the region with the critically-needed letters
A, E, I, O and U, and it is hoped to render countless Bosnian names
more pronounceable.
"For six years, we have stood by while names like Ygrjvslhv and Tzlynhr
and Glrm have been horribly butchered by millions around the world,"
Clinton said. "Today, the United States must finally stand up and say
'Enough.' It is time the people of Bosnia finally had some vowels in
their incomprehensible words. The US is proud to lead the crusade in
this noble endeavour."
The deployment, dubbed Operation Vowel Storm by the State Department,
is set for early next week, with the Adriatic port cities of Sjlbvdnzv
and Grzny slated to be the first recipients. Two C-130 transport
planes, each carrying over 500 24-count boxes of "E's", will fly from
Andrews Air Force Base across the Atlantic and airdrop the letters
over the cities.
Citizens of Grzny and Sjlbvdnzv eagerly await the arrival of the vowels.
"My God, I do not think we can last another day," Trszg Grzdnjkln, 44,
said. "I have six children and none of them has a name which is
understandable to me or to anyone else. Mr Clinton, please send my
poor, wretched family just one 'E'. Please." Said Sjlbvdnzv resident
Grg Hmphrs, 67: "With just a few key letters, I could be George
Humphries. This is my dream."
The airdrop represents the largest deployment of any letter to a foreign
country since 1984. During the summer of that year, the US shipped
92,000 consonants to Ethiopia, providing cities like Ouaouoaua,
Eaoiiuae and Aao with vital, life-giving supplies of L's, S's and T's.
The consonant-relief effort failed, however, when vast quantities of the
letters were intercepted and hoarded by violent, gun-toting warlords.
John Gray
"(or one of the team)" - how your hospital appointment letter indicates that you won't be seeing the Consultant...
"(or one of the team)" - how your hospital appointment letter indicates that you won't be seeing the Consultant...
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- PlatinumLounger
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- Administrator
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- PlutoniumLounger
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Re: eye test
I didn't see that one coming.
Maybe it's time for an eye-check.
A parallel joke (Ronnie Barker?) has the punch line "Printed by E.G.Chapman, Printers, Bristol"
Cheers
I
There's nothing heavier than an empty water bottle
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- PlutoniumLounger
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Re: eye test
Rumour on the street has it that The Yanks never got past the A-bomb.
Cheers, Chris
There's nothing heavier than an empty water bottle
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- PlatinumLounger
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Re: eye test
I check? O, U should.
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- PlutoniumLounger
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Re: eye test
I think so!
Today I saw a video that appeared to say "Virat Kohli's team bowled out for 36 in Adelaide defeat"
Thirty-six? That can't be right, surely?
Also two of the Aussie side scored double-tons?
Cheers, Chris
There's nothing heavier than an empty water bottle
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- PlatinumLounger
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Re: eye test
I can't see that video - but presumably that low score occurred in a test match in 2020.
The two double centuries took place in a test match being played now.
The two double centuries took place in a test match being played now.
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- PlatinumLounger
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Re: eye test
John Gray
"(or one of the team)" - how your hospital appointment letter indicates that you won't be seeing the Consultant...
"(or one of the team)" - how your hospital appointment letter indicates that you won't be seeing the Consultant...
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- PlutoniumLounger
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Re: eye test
Thank you Geoff. I confess to being confused. When first I watched it I figured it was played at the WACA, Herdsman Island, Melville Water and all that, Australia vs India, but then I saw references to Adelaide.
I thought that I had seen a double ton, and a collapse of something like 6 for 39 or so
Cheers, Chris
There's nothing heavier than an empty water bottle
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- Panoramic Lounger
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