Red River Cereal

[ChrisGreaves]

I have inherited a plastic container of this stuff, and hate throwing anything away.
Web pages describing it seem to be populated by grown-ups with resentments against their childhood ("I'll never eat this stuff again as long as I live ...")
I place my hopes in the mature population of Eileen's Lounge in the hopes that those of you who are regular consumers of this uniquely Canadian Dish might offer some advice on the preparation, cooking, and consumption of Red River Cereal.
P.S. My normal breakfast is a microwaved bowl with a few raisins, a 1/2 cup of bulk oatmeal, and water added.

[HansV]

How long do you have to microwave a bowl to make it edible?

[John Gray]

Why am I reminded of Dr Samuel Johnson's dictionary's definition of Oats:

"A grain, which in England is generally given to horses, but in Scotland supports the people."

I suppose the Red River cereal would make a good substitute for tarmac?

[HansV]

This is not very encouraging...

x.png

[Samantha]

Chris, I've never tried Red River Cereal, but I like hot cereals, and have a couple of similar multi-grain products in my pantry for when I want a change from oatmeal. From the instructions on this recipe for Red River Cereal, I would guess that you should be able to prepare it the same way you cook your oatmeal.

[Leif]

Why am I reminded....

I dunno. But as Dorothy L sayers said: "I always have a quotation for everything -- it saves original thinking.”

[ChrisGreaves]

How long do you have to microwave a bowl to make it edible?

Oh Great.
Just Great!
Now besides a Pirates smilie we need a Pyrex smilie ....

[ChrisGreaves]

This is not very encouraging...

Well of course not (he wrote, refraining from adding "idiot"), you have to add water and boil it in a pan for a while.
Or microwave it.

[StuartR]

How long do you have to microwave a bowl to make it edible?

This one should have been in puzzles.

However long you microwave the bowl for, it never becomes edible.

[ChrisGreaves]

... this recipe for Red River Cereal...

At last! Some intelligence. And not surprisingly, from a woman. Two women actually.
Samantha, thank you. The recipe to which you linked is a 1997 post, which will come in handy because I suspect that the Red River cereal in my possession might be at least that old.

I tried adding water and boiling this morning, and by taking one spoonful every half hour I think I'll be able to finish it around 3pm.
The idea of adding fruit sounds good, providing it makes it tasty enough to eat all at once.
Otherwise I won't be able to finish my morning cereal until after my bed time.

[ChrisGreaves]

However long you microwave the bowl for, it never becomes edible.

I dunno.
I rather suspect that in a blind test, on paper at any rate, the microwaved bowl might come out, to coin a phrase, ahead of the Red River Cereal.
(later) It just dawned on me that perhaps the cereal is not named after grains grown in the district of The Red River per se but might be material mined from the grey sandstone cliffs that line the river.
Much as they mine clay from the Murray River at Red Cliffs (Mildura) and pipe it Adelaide where they market it as "drinkable tap water" to recent immigrants from the U.K..

[John Gray]

I tried adding water and boiling this morning, and by taking one spoonful every half hour I think I'll be able to finish it around 3pm.
The idea of adding fruit sounds good, providing it makes it tasty enough to eat all at once.
Otherwise I won't be able to finish my morning cereal until after my bed time.

I refer you to John McEnroe's outburst: "You cannot be cereal!".

And it's beginning to sound even more like a road-mending material than I had thought previously.

Perhaps there is more nutritional value in the cardboard container than in the cereal?

[ChrisGreaves]

I suppose the Red River cereal would make a good substitute for tarmac?

I don't think so. From my limited experience of Red River cereal it seems to me that once it has set, you couldn't melt it on a roof in Marble Bar.

[Samantha]

Chris, do you have a crock pot or slow cooker? If so, tonight before you go to bed (or perhaps this afternoon if you want a head-start) put the cereal, water and whatever fruit or sweetener you want into the crock pot and set it on low for at least 10 hours. When you awaken the cereal should be cooked and ready to eat. You may have to experiment to find the proper ratio of water to grain.

This is my favorite way to cook steel-cut oats, which normally take 45 minutes to an hour of constant stirring on the stove. I cook up enough for a week, keeping single portion sizes in the fridge for a quick reheat on subsequent mornings.

[jonwallace]

This is my favorite way to cook steel-cut oats, which normally take 45 minutes to an hour of constant stirring on the stove. I cook up enough for a week, keeping single portion sizes in the fridge for a quick reheat on subsequent mornings.

You might want to get all traditional on your porridge (for that is what you are describing - oatmeal indeed!) and keep it in a drawer, below the baby* as per this page.

*requires confidence in one's nappy folding technique

[Samantha]

You might want to get all traditional on your porridge (for that is what you are describing - oatmeal indeed!) and keep it in a drawer, below the baby* as per this page.

*requires confidence in one's nappy folding technique

I guess I'm more traditional than I realized (well, except for the drawer below the baby part -- I'll stick to the fridge for long-term storage). Now to find a proper spurtle for stirring...

BTW, your link didn't work, but upon investigation the address had been repeated. Once I removed the duplicate info, the page loaded beautifully.

[Argus]

Why am I reminded....

I dunno. But as Dorothy L sayers said: "I always have a quotation for everything -- it saves original thinking.”

But sometimes it's faster to make up stuff.
http://www.dilbert.com/strips/comic/2005-05-26/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Works here as well; "about Pirates smilies"; you don't have to read (the thread), just post a comment (/.), Fixed. Next thread!

[HansV]

This thread started out in Scuttlebutt, but since we now have a Cooking forum, I've moved it here(despite the high Scuttlebutt content).

[ChrisGreaves]

... as per [url=http://www.electricscotland.com/poetry/ ... r2.htmthis page[/url].

Interesting. Fancy "The Workers" complaining because they were being fed too much salmon!

[ChrisGreaves]

This thread started out in Scuttlebutt, but since we now have a Cooking forum, I've moved it here(despite the high Scuttlebutt content).

I AM IMPRESSED WITH THE SOFTWARE

here's why:
I first posted my "first post" in the cooking Forum, suggesting the thread be moved.
I then tabbed back to the thread which I still had on view in Scuttlebut, composed a reply, and some time between Preview/Submit saw the flash from Hans that the thread had been moved.
"Oh Darn!" I said to myself, as is my wont, "I'll have to copy/paste over to the new forum".
But no! The move collected my reply on-the-fly.

Blows my mind!